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Duh Funnies
    How to describe someone who's...uh...you know...Duh
  • ~ Lights are on, nobody's home.
  • ~ A few clowns short of a circus.
  • ~ A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
  • ~ A few peas short of a casserole.
  • ~ Doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box.
  • ~ Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
  • ~ The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
  • ~ One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
  • ~ One taco short of a combination plate.
  • ~ Fell out of the family tree
  • ~ A few feathers short of a whole duck.
  • ~ The cheese slid off his cracker.
  • ~ Body by Fisher; brains by Mattel.
  • ~ Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
  • ~ An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
  • ~ As smart as bait.
  • ~ Chimney's clogged.
  • ~ Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
  • ~ Forgot to pay his brain bill.
  • ~ His sewing machine's out of thread.
  • ~ If she had another brain, it would be lonely.
  • ~ Slinky's kinked.
  • ~ Surfing in Nebraska.
  • ~ Too much yardage between the goal posts.
  • ~ Big like ox; smart like tractor.
  • ~ A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
  • ~ Not wound too tight.
  • ~ Shirt size: large. Cap size: small.
  • ~ Room temperature IQ.
  • ~ A few box cars short of a full trainload.
  • ~ Missing a hard-drive.
  • ~ Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
  • ~ Doesn't have two wits to bat together.
  • ~ Not the brightest crayon in the box.
  • ~ One tire short of a Goodyear.
  • ~ A few Pinata's short of a fiesta.
  • ~ Butter slipped off the noodles.
  • ~ Not firing on all thrusters.
  • ~ Two cards short of a full deck.
  • ~ Three dots short of an ink-blot test.
  • ~ Forgot to use a surge protector.
  • ~ Half bubble off level.
  • ~ The mental agility of a used soap dish.
  • ~ Not the sharpest tool in the shed.
  • ~ Rowing around the lake with one oar.
  • ~ Couldn't pour water from a boot even if the instructions were written on the heel.
  • ~ A few hairs short of a wig.
  • ~ Not the sharpest pencil in the box.
  • ~ Not the brightest bulb on the tree.
  • ~ One flower short of a bouquet.
  • ~ One can short of a case.
  • ~ One Easter Egg short of a basket.
  • ~ When they were handing out brains, he must have heard "trains", and well, he ordered a boxcar.
  • ~ Not the greenest cucumber in the field.
  • ~ Three feathers short of being fluffy.
  • ~ The dip stick doesn't reach the oil.
  • ~ Driveway doesn't go all the way to the road.
  • ~ A few bricks shy of a load.
  • ~ Smart as a box of rocks.
  • ~ Bright as a burnt out light bulb.
  • ~ Sharp as a bubble.
  • ~ Nice toy--no batteries.
  • ~ He shook the family tree and all the fruits and nuts hit his head.
  • ~ A few skeeters short of a swarm.
  • ~ The engine's on, but it's not in gear
  • ~ A few fish short of a limit.
  • ~ Not just up the creek, the water's all dried up.
  • ~ Not firing on all cylinders.
  • ~ The horse is running but the rider's dead.
  • ~ A few pickles short of a full barrel.

And from a DownUnder friend:

~ Kangaroos loose in the top paddock (hopping around all over the place)
~ A sausage short of a barbie (barbeque or bbq?)